Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Andrew Update

Andrew is scheduled for surgery to remove the tumor tomorrow, 10/1, at 11:00am MDT. The surgery will take anywhere from 7-12 hours, so it will be a long day for all involved. I was able to get a flight to Boise tomorrow morning, so I'll be there to do whatever I can. Not sure what that means, but I'll be there all the same.

The doctors have shared some new concerns about the tumor and it's location, including it's potential adherance to blood vessels and the brain stem. There are terrifying risks involved in the tumor removal that have left us a bit stunned, but we're trying to dwell on the positives. They say they'll know if the tumor is malignant before the surgery is finished. No matter how well the surgery goes, it's certain that there will be a long and difficult rehabilitation period for Andrew.

Luckily, at this point, he's not in any physical pain.

I keep trying to understand what Andrew must be thinking and feeling as this all plays out. My dad says he seems to understand what is going on, and is taking it like a trooper. No tears, no complaints. I think about what it will be like for him after the surgery. To wake up to his new reality...maybe without the ability to do things he could do before like talk, or walk, or see. How do you prepare an 8 year old boy for that possibility?

I worry about Brittany. She's so strong, but this requires something beyond strength. Something no mother should ever have to test. The physical, emotional and financial implications of this trial are overwhelming to ponder. Again, I'm at a loss for what to do, or how to help. My baby sister and her sweet little family are facing something far more difficult than I can begin to understand.

I'm doing my best to keep my focus on Andrew. As a good friend reminded me, this is about Andrew...not me. I'm sad, and I'm scared, but that's not what matters. This is about how Andrew feels and what Andrew needs. Keeping that in mind somehow makes things seem a little clearer. Not that I have any idea how this is going to go, or what anyone needs, but that my purpose is simple. To support Andrew by providing Brittany, Taylor and Andrew with positive energy, prayers, hope and love. To do whatever I can to make this easier for Andrew, if that is possible.

Tomorrow I'll be praying for angels to protect our little angel...and to let him stay with us a little longer.

Love, prayers and hope.

I'll continue to update my blog as we move through this process.

For anyone who would like to contribute, my dad has set up a fund for Andrew to help Brittany with what is sure to be astronomical medical expenses. Donations can be made at any Washington Mutual (WAMU) location to The Andrew Vanderploeg Fund - Acct. 3170086447, or send donations:

c/o Randy Nelson
5447 S. Zang Ct.
Littleton, CO 80127

Please make checks payable to the Andrew Vanderploeg Fund.

Sunday, September 28, 2008

My Bob Amato




It's strange how quickly life changes. In an instant your whole focus and direction can be derailed by the unknown or unexpected. I had one of those moments yesterday. I got a call from my dad yesterday morning that shook me to the core and left me feeling completely helpless and my heart aching. My 8 year old nephew, Andrew, had just had an MRI of his brain to see if they could determine the cause of some issues with his motor skills on the right side of his body. They discovered a large tumor covering 70% of his cerebellum.

My little Andrew has a brain tumor. It's real. It's scary. It's a gut check like I've never experienced before. I'm glad I was in Denver to receive the news. I was able to spend the entire day with my family as we prayed, hoped, grieved and tried to find some kind of comfort in the reality of this unbelievable news.


We'd all noticed that Andrew was a bit clumsy, and even joked about it with him, but thought nothing major of it. There are lots of kids that are not overly coordinated, but recently his uncoordinated movements began to look a bit different. Kids at school were even teasing him because of the way he walked. The catalyst to get him checked was a call from his teacher. She said that his handwriting had been deteriorating over the last bit, which had been a concern to her, but she was truly concerned when he had been unable to hold on to a pair of scissors in class.

After finding the tumor, it was discovered that there was extra fluid on his brain, increasing the pressure to a dangerous level, so the first priority was to relieve that pressure. Last night they drilled a small hole in his skull to allow the fluid to drain, and his motor skills have already improved.

Now it is a matter of "hurry up and wait" as we wait for the specialist to do a detailed analysis of his MRI and schedule surgery to remove the tumor. We won't know until they have done the surgery whether it is benign or malignant. There is a possibility that, because of the size or malignancy, he will have to undergo chemotherapy and/or radiation treatments after the surgery.

My sister Brittany, Andrew's mom, Taylor, Andrew's big sister, and Andrew live in Boise, ID so part of the angst all of us were feeling yesterday was the inability to be there to give them all a big hug and let them know how much we love them.


Brittany is one of the strongest and most capable people I know, and I admire her ability to face adversity head on. She always seems to push forward, taking on the challenges that come her way with very little complaint and a whole lot of resolve. Even still, I can't imagine what she must be going through right now. I wish there was something I could do to make it...well, I don't know. I'm not sure there is a way to make something like this "easier". The complete impotence of my abilities as the big sister is evident in the reality that I don't even know what anyone could possibly do to help shoulder the burden for her.

Dad says Taylor has been the perfect big sister. She didn't want to leave the hospital yesterday because she wanted to be with her brother. She says she's just happy that they were able to figure out what was wrong with Andrew and can't wait for them to help him get back to being "Andrew" again.

I'm teetering on the brink of tears at any given moment. The logical side of my brain keeps telling me that there is every reason to hope, and that dwelling on the worst case scenarios is not helpful or productive...but the emotional side of me keeps thinking about my Little Andrew. My Bob Amato.

I remember the day Andrew was born. I had a night class and was unable to get to the hospital to meet the little trooper until after 8pm, which meant it was just me, Brittany and beautiful little Andrew. I held him for a long time that night, listening to his sad little congested breathing and falling in love. Such a precious little boy.

I basically lived at Brittany's house for the next 6 months or so while I was working on my Master's Degree, and there were many nights that I spent on her couch doing my homework with Andrew asleep on my chest. Memories that I cherish.

He's always been such a sweet and kind little boy. Always so full of love. When he was just starting to talk in sentences that you could understand he had a fascination with the Veggietales. One of my favorite memories of all time was when he began telling people that his name was "Bob Amato" (Bob the Tomato). It melted my heart it was so adorable! From then on, he knew that was my favorite thing, and what I wanted to hear when I asked him what his name was. When he started to speak more clearly and began saying "Bob THE Mato" it almost broke my heart...he was growing up!! Then one day he actually said "Bob the Tomato" and I wanted to cry. There was also the brief period when he was way too cool to tell me his name was anything other than Andrew, and I really had to try hard to coax it out of him...but he would always do it, grudgingly, just because he knew it was what I wanted to hear.

It's hard to sit back and wait for this to play out. All I can do is pray, and love, and hope. That's what I'm doing. Praying and loving and hoping. Hoping that my Bob Amato is going to be home and healthy very soon.